DIARY ENTRY 12

from E. A.
to maketodayhistory@gmail.com,
date Wed, May 7, 2008 at 3:56 AM
subject one day...

hide details 3:56 AM (3 hours ago)


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12 am
The beginning of this.
I have been sitting in front of the computer typing responses to unanswered emails. A long tall glass of water sweats on the table. yum.
The curtains are closed. My feet are on the desk. The ash tray is full. The room is dirty. Crap on the TV.

12: 29 am
Been mindlessly surfing the web, reading music reviews. I watch a music video, then another, and another. time for a bathroom break.

12: 49 am
trying to find a movie to watch, don't want to go to sleep. My mind is on many many many things, and I don't feel like doing a thing about it right now.

1:05 am
i just realised i had forgotten about the water.
i have decided to watch Restoration. I had seen it years ago, remembered there was something I liked about it.

1:50 am
Cant really focus on the movie, worried about some paperwork I have to do.
Restless. Back to the movie.

3:50 am
movie done. not bad. hardcore insomnia. gotta pick another movie.



11:52am
Woke up with the computer screen on. i never made it through movie number two.
Didn't really want to move, big surprise. one foot to the floor first, feels like ages before the second even considers it.
check email. gotta eat and get ready to go to class.

12:50pm
all fed and clean, mail checked, newspapers read, off to school.

4:13pm
Back home, ate a fish cutter. school actually beginning to feel like an art school. Very few people around today, strange.
Emails back and forth to Sonia. Trying to figure out trip possibilities. Things seem to be falling into place. I will need a visa for Europe, Bart will not.
Natalya here on her break from work, she brought a steak and some broccoli. Gonna watch a few episodes of Weeds.

5:03pm
Justin stopped by. We talked about badly made chairs and Richard's birthday on Saturday.
Had two cigarettes while we spoke.

5:32pm
Natalya is cooking. Smells good. Nicholas called.

6:05pm
My mother offered me a glass of wine. Natalya had her meal. Had a conversation with my father about an exhibition at Queens Park.
Headache coming on. Haven't had one in a while. They start behind the eyes, moves its way around the side of my head to my jaw and my neck.
Staring at the computer screen cant be helping.
The sin is on its way out, the dogs are barking. The AC is a little too cold.

10:07pm
I just woke up after what seemed like ages of pain and at least an hour of trying to force myself to sleep. The headache got much worse. Light started to heart my eyes. Natalya left while i held a pillow over my eyes and pressed my fingers into my temples to try to ease the pain from the headache (or at least make me feel like i was able to do something about it). I took pills. two kinds, don't really know what they were, they came from the mother. Eventually the second set of pills must have made it possible to sleep. Whenever this happens, sleep is the only way to handle the pain.
Now its gone, and more of the day has passed without me. Now i will be up late again.
Ribs for dinner. I will eat by myself, the rest of the house has gone to sleep. Mytime.

What I listened to today:
Saturday Looks Good To Me
Leonard Chohen
Tunng
ESG


11:35pm
Spent some time on the phone with Nicholas. The regular rundown/catchup. It was a three cigarette conversation. the Obama/Clinton mess is on CNN, yet another primary, Indiana. This day will soon be over. My night will probably carry on for a while. I have things to do tomorrow.

12:00am - Again
Its over.
I am sitting in front of the computer typing this diary. A different glass of water sweats on the table.
The curtains are closed. My feet are on the desk. The ash tray is empty. The room is dirty. Crap on the TV.